Lost Children

Let's be honest.  Have you ever lost a kid for even a split second?  Long enough for your breath to stop and your heart to race and your mind to say mean and ugly things to you.

I have.  It was all of 2 seconds and I flipped out.  Ginger was not yet 2.  I was big pregnant.  We were in a big box store, during the day. I was on a mission.  (I usually am when I shop.  I know what I need and I go straight there.)  Ginger did not want to hold my hand, and you all know how much trouble it is to make them at that age.  I tried to look forward and down to the side at the same time, but I must have blinked.  Ginger was gone.  My heart jumped, I inhaled and forgot to exhale and I looked at all the people around me like they were kidnappers.  I said her name, once, twice, three times.  The last time with more than a little panic in my voice.  She appeared out from under a rack of clothes.  I got face to face with her and I yelled at her.  (Sorry, mom, for doing my fair share of hiding in the clothes racks, I promise not to do it any more.)

I was not bothered by the nice little lady a couple of yards away that stopped dead in her tracks to see if things were resolved.  I did not worry about scaring my daughter.  She needed to be scared.  I needed her to know that I was scared.  It was scary, times 100.

These days, when Ginger gets ahead of me or turns a corner before me, I don't panic.  I just remind her to stay where I can see her and she comes back into view.  She usually comes back into view without the reminder.  She knows how it makes me feel when I can't find her and she feels the same way when she can't find me.

For Sugar, I was not at all opposed to using the teddy bear backpack leash thing.  I still sometimes think that a leash might be the exact right thing for keeping up with my 2 excitable children.